She's hot, in a Megan Fox with Down's Syndrome kinda way. Like, she'd win Miss Deliverance Pageant
At least she's the hottest one. Oh well, it's all about stats
u know u need to get laid when watching mike wazowskis gf from monsters inc makes u horny
Mars, I'm going to name my child horatio mars. He will hate me till he gets high. Then he'll understand
i'm so bored i'm watching porn for fun. not even jacking off or anything. just watching.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just saw a license plate that said "Guidete" at college. This proves the world is officially ending in 2012
I think I ruined Robin and Mikes anniversary. I walked in on them fucking, accidentally broke the necklace he gave her, and I stole the keg from their party. Not in that order
She refused to give me a hand job while we were watching a war movie saying she didn't wanna disrespect the soldiers
I swear, if he gets me a bowling ball for Christmas, I will throw it at him.
that trick or treat candy bucket that we used to collect beer money last night was very helpful when I vomited in it this morning
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Do you think you could cook pancakes while i blow you?
No, I didn't meet up with him! That's when I had chlamydia.
I'll seduce him with my charm, after all, I am a graceful swan.
More like a demented cow.
I asked you why you bought a sword and you then replied with the greek alphabet and then tried to assure me that samurais are apart of greek life.
I often worry that if I get famous, people from my past will recognize me and start talking to the media
I wish I got tanner on friday but I feel like I spent most of my time puking in the bathroom. I love my life
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