I'm drive I can fine osifer
Crying babies in a bar. Really?
And she just changed the baby's diaper on the table. It's killing the beer garden.
call me tomorrow and ask me about coke-whore stripper. It hasnt happened yet, but im sure it will be plenty disappointing.
For some reason, my father is not responding to the 5 texts I sent him that all read: "Dad dad dad dad dad dddaadd dddddaaaaaaaaad dad".
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Is he smart?
Why would i know that. That would deal with the top half of his body. I only deal with the bottom half.
I'm glad the dog doesn't judge me for doing leftover lines and watching George of the Jungle at 10 am
laying naked on couch sucking water through straw. i can still feel the orgasm from last night. thank you mdma.
I worked hard to give you that boner. No one else should get to enjoy it!
And then I went through the chix filet drive through for breakfast in all my republican post sex glory
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just want somebody who'll randomly bring me pizza and lovingly squeeze my butt. Is there a dating app for that, do you think?
What is it in my brain that makes me look at a penis and think "that belongs in my mouth"?
Omg I just woke up. In the hallway outside my room. I know you had something to do with this
She threw my purse across the room almost broke a lamp and this all started bc she forgot what an air mattress was
May I the honors of taking your dick tonight?
The honor would be all mine.
Are you rolling a joint while doing homework?
No, I am rolling a joint with my homework.
Randomize