Already got asked if we're dating
i just overheard my mom tell my dad he should drink less so he could hit the right hole
some girl that im facebook friends with has H1N1, im scared to even go to her facebook page
his tattoo said carpe diem which i thought was ironic considering his epilepsy
Why do my balls have what looks like rust on them?
Just got tipped $5 for distracting some dude's gf while he got another girl's number. Bro-code at its finest.
every facebook tagged picture of yours, you are either drinking, swimming or drunk in water
after last night my drinking related hospital bracelet collection is up to 13
EARTHQUAKE STATUS DRINKING GAME
I cannot be this high in this house. This house has so many of my secrets in its walls.
He puked over my shoulder into the toilet. The guy in the next stall sounded totally appalled.
The lady that was sitting beside me thought the best way to cheer herself up was to pet and ruffle my hair while crying and telling me her problems...
Dude I love you. So much. Thank u. I'm safea. In allysi lns car. Mine towed. If u loved me ud leand me 500 in the morning. Sleep on it nd let me know.
What am I supposed to say? "Oh hey, I can't go out with you tonight because I can't picture myself sleeping with you and I was high and just trying to be nice when I said yes"?
I woke up under the kitchen table. Andy is cursing out Joe Exotic's name in between heaves in the bathroom. Jay is trying to sleep w/ a shirt tied over his eyes. Lena and Brad braved the sun to go get bloody mary supplies and food. I'd say the Tiger King drinking game was a success.
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