kristin has been a bad kristin
you left your dildo in my car
rules of finders keepers apply
I woke up on the stairs at of a Disneyland hotel. Yes, my night was amazing.
Dude i thought about you literally the second after I came. This friendship is starting to cross some serious boundaries
Come on Nikki god gave you a vagina for a reason, so you could tell guys what kind of shots to buy you
Then you started asking people on the drunk bus if they knew the word "gumption". if they didn't you told them they weren't taking advantage of their high education opportunities and you were disappointed in them.
My mom has finally acknowledged my soft spot for Russians. Finally.
The acoustics in my bra are fantastic.
I want to show up to tomorrow's study group looking like I got hit by a train. A train made of dicks.
You're not talking any sense into me. You're cheering me on to disaster.
... is that not half the reason I'm your best friend in the first place?
We were both too drunk to drive home. So we did it in the coat closet and then I walked home. 20/20 hindsight: Could have both walked to my apartment and then had sex there.
When your grandma invites you to a sweet girls' Valentine's dinner with your mom and sister, but you have to decline because you're trying to get two dudes to rail you at once...
got a free grilled cheese. Didn't even have to talk about Jesus
he high fived his dick after we had sex
no real plans this weekend. trying to derail the alcohol induced fucking hell train I've been riding for the past three weeks.
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