You were right. It hurts to walk today.
Just saw the true definition of the muffin top and camel toe all on one person at the DC zoo... Tried to take a pic but she got away..
I just remember telling jokes while vomitting
where are my pants?
you were passing out with two blankets and the person next to you was cold so you gave him your pants to keep warm
only my mom would pack illegal paraphernalia in a care package..
I just found our entire wall-to-wall from September 2006 printed out and clipped... it's 49 pages. Blackout me is so considerate of bored-at-work me
That's unfortunate. Distance can be a stoner's greatest enemy.
You make it sound like a battle for Middle Earth.
he's hot he just has too much baggage, and has really fucking skinny ankles which freaks me out
you aren't having sex with his ankles, As long as knee caps and above are good, i'd go for it
As I type I'm climbing my cousins swingset so I can take a nap inside the slide. Fuck this hangover. I always win.
I woke up because a stranger was shoving an already lit bowl into my mouth. Spring break is awesome
Just threw up in front of the Boy Scouts on my base. Welcome to the Navy kids.
hes duct taped to the wall and we're throwing eggs at him. i love thirsty thursday.
like i literally can feel my uterus getting frustrated at me for not being pregnant.
You drunkenly said something along the lines of "move forever" to the lady standing in your way. Needless to say you had too many mimosas at breakfast.
So hungover and decided to eat a burrito and a pot brownie for dinner, this is what adulthood looks like.
Randomize
