Doing final review now. Then epic shit. Then going to take it. Should start it be 1030. Done by 2. Drunk by 3. Hammered by 4. Blacked out by 5. Streaking by 6. Jail sometime after that
Remember that time I came into your room after taking a muscle relaxant and we argued about what state has the longest coastline?
the couple across the street's about to bang. go get the popcorn and come join us.
One of her kids, Dakota I think, got stuck in a ceiling fan and she had a fit, thats when she found the penis hat.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Are you seriously picking mariokart over a blowjob? nott to sound like a bitch but seriously?
fyi gin and iced coffee...not my greatest invention
My motherly instincts are overcoming my slutty ones
I think it's time we have the "weird fetish" talk.
Is it just me or did a policeman park your car last night?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Do something fun then. Blow up the house or whatever.
How have you survived this long?
Dumb luck and a deal with the devil.
So there I was praying he didn't go limp again, choking on a long, long gray ball hair. This is my Saturday night. This. Is. My. Life.
his name is devion and he has a voice like velvet and handcuffs
I have family pictures in an hour and a half and I'm 9 beers deep. This is how I get written out of my grandparents will...
I am never taking a razor down there again. He'll have to love me as I am.
Btw I thought it was impossible to use up 48 bottles of patron in one night but I was wrong...
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