So why didn't Edward and the Cullens just kill Hitler?
You need to stop watching Twilight.
i've been fucking this guy since february and just found out he might be uncircumsized. currently google image searching to confirm.
I just worked out and used handles of vodka as weights. Whoever said alcoholism is detrimental to you health obviously has no fucking idea.
There are lots of gay asians. This is better than i was expecting
Believe me. As soon as the boss man is out the door. I am on my way to wow your vagina with my horse-like attributes.
Do you know why I have a burn shaped like a tiny spork?
So last night I taught an old homeless dude to respond to "Blue" so I could shout your my boy Blue at the party
It was like inception, a dream, in a dream, in the back of a dodge charger.
Its not even real halloween yet. This extremely toxic yet briliant costume is going to kill me
I think that all guys are assholes, some of them just have less assholeish qualities that we accept in our lives and that we can look past enough to deal. They have to be a pretty special asshole.
I just spent 3 hours in the back of an unmarked police cruiser. Best. Date. Ever.
And he's back on taking these stupid testosterone supplements to kickstart him back into working out. And they just make him angry and horny all the time. I'm like great, just in time to meet my whole family for Christmas.
If you ever "miss" working, I'm going to fist you with my hulk hands. BOTH of them.
i just got drunk and created an entire Dr Seuss unit for my first graders.
I just want him to make us coffee. And whack off into the sunset
Randomize
