I DON'T KNOW WHERE WE ARE WE ARE TOO FUCKING ELEVATED.
Me either! Fuck yeah, 12th and something. 12th and hamburger stand.
is this the only place in the world where you can get shot on one side of town, and have to stop for cows crossing the street on the other side?
the line at the liquor store is out the door, and students in line are high-fiving like crazy...i love college snow days
since we're both too lazy to go to each others house, you drink there, i'll drink here and we'll skype. it's the same thing.
He posted on my wall. Idk if I'm ready for that big of a commitment.
If I refrain from fucking my manager, I'm going to reward myself by fucking that guy from the photo department.
dude you need a shock collar for some of the things you say when you're drunk.
now that I know that you did coke with your mom I can't look at her the same
Matt says that there are strip club auditions in our living room and he'd like you to audition.
Just got a message on OkCupid from a 20-year-old who has "Momma's Boy" tattoed across his chest and thinks the earth is bigger than the sun.
I like her. She smells like old lady but tastes like whiskey
She dressed up in a sexy maid outfit for me, but she got mad when I asked her to actually do some cleaning.
She said she wanted you to slurp her vagina like a spaghetti noodle.
Drink drank drunk tankkkkn, LETS GO
no dude he sent me cemetery flowers, i know it. they are half dried out roses in the shape of a cross, seriously. and he is not religious. so he robbed a freaking grave site for me. am i like an accessory to grave robbing now??
damnit this is what you get for dating guys with neck tattoos
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