Pussy?
how
Wat do u mean how?
Come on, it shouldn't be that hard NOT to suck someone's dick
Went to bed at 4 in a strangers bed. woke up wearing scrubs, realized i was gonna be late for work so i just wore the same clothes as the day before... i don't have a toothbrush and im pretty sure there is leftover semen in my mouth. at some point i think i was at the beach cuz theres is sand in my underwear. i love newport already.
Dude, no matter how drunk you are, it's not okay to hug every other guy at a strip club. Mainly because boners are far too common.
My RA just gave me tips on how to have discreet shower sex. Were we that loud?
Operation Purity has been aborted
do you have any idea how hard it is to keep a boner while another dude is writing on your dick in sharpie?
We let 3 boys take us home and then we woke up in the middle of the night, stole all the coozies out of the house, a loaf of bread, a case of water, a pair of shorts, called a cab, and went home.
I have a lot of questions this morning, most of them start with "Did I..."
unless you have a dick and you were thinking of chopping that off
Like I cant decide if he's like autistic or something or just seriously cock blocks himself on purpose with this shit
Just for the record, I did not have sex in your bed. Happy 4th of July.
Our breakfast options are microwave popcorn, wavy lays and fireball
Anal on new furniture sounds like a quickest way to violate a warranty
gave out my moms phone number instead of mine last night... thattttttttttttttt dunk.
Randomize
