my mother just offered to pay for my fake id.
You went to church with your boobs hanging out?
Theyr'e a gift from god, I figured I should show him i'm using them well.
So the weirdest part of it all was he whispered in my ear "can i eat you out on your tredmill?" I dont find him attractive at all anymore
I don't remember him, but he's saved in my phone as "uh oh zbt"
She's never going to forget it... Christmas Anal.
Also, last night I had a dream that I was in a victoria's secret fashion show and they made me wear a t-shirt over my lingerie. Spring dieting begins now.
He challenged me to a drink off, I couldn't just say no. It was a matter of pride really.
And as he was cursing your name from the bathroom you were ordering yourself another drink on his tab. The poor bastard had no clue you were a pro drunk
Thanks for the pic It's going to be lovely dealing with my boner while I'm in a meeting with your father.
If I die write a nice eulogy and bury me with my star wars bobbleheads
honestly if there were pictures of last night i would be embarrassed.... im embarrassed without pictures
I sent my brother over to my ex's to get the rest of my stuff. He comes back SEVEN HOURS LATER, high as fuck without my shit! No loyalty.
He told you he loved you. Then you wanted to find a chainsaw to cut his dick off.
Other than the whole stab wound in my leg thing, today was pretty good. The nurses all loved me and gave me a sandwich and juice.
One can only be this extremely wet once a year and I feel like I'm bitch slapping god by not using this gift he has bestowed on me.
I've got two reasons for you to come over later and one of them is pierced.
Randomize
