as soon as you compare a person to an animal, all sexual interest is out the window
After I told my husband the docter shot me in the ass, he said - oh they can but I can't?!
is it just me, or are high schoolers getting sexier?
How is it that lesbians won't hit on me at a gay club, but they'll hit on me every time I go to Walmart?
id like to point out that while i was just peeing a condom fell out of my vag.
I JUST SHOOK HIS GRANDMOTHER'S HAND. WITH COCK HANDS. THIS IS NOT FUNNY.
There is a good chance that the other night after a wedding reception i was at that i mailed you a drink coaster.
Just showered now I smell like berries instead of shame
Note to self: don't tell your girlfriends dad you can have his daughter in bed by ten and home by midnight. He doesnt find it funny
I'm confident that their children would come out as 100% authentic rats
They have a genuine stripper pole secured to the floor of their living room. I am thoroughly take advantage of it. I've made $5 so far. Why don't more places have poles??!
it still weirds me out that Robin Thicke is Alan Thicke's son
No one understands the complete and utter debilitating 3 day bday bender.
there's cocaine on the ipad again........... was your sister here last night?
I know I may be showing my age by saying this but this is the first time I have been eaten out in the parking lot behind the Clairmont Inn since 1990
Randomize
