ohhhh fuckk. chicks a dude.
I think we should boobie trap our beer this time using duct tape, rubber bands, seran wrap, and urine. Trust me I have a plan and it will work.
due to concerns over safety, the theme of the 'naked fondue party' has now been changed to the 'naked fondue party with optional apron' please b.y.o.apron. extra prizes for most creative apron.
you should give me head with plastic fangs in
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Great. I get laid, Leslie Nielsen dies. I can't have have sex anymore, the film community can't take another loss like this.
woke up this morning in the hall outside of my parents room with a sign taped to myself that said "im sorry"...
When I sent you a text telling you to splash water on your face, you texted me back with 'Iwehre N qyull.'
Riding on an electric horse at the grocery store... dunno how that conversation went but I hope you picked up a 12 pack.
Admit it. It's a brilliant plan with hundreds of possible repercutions.
Understatement of the year.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Ugh. I guess I'm crying loudly or something. My mom just came in and gave me milk, chocolate, a Xanax, and her weed "for the break up blues". Her ways of affection are so odd.
I found three vicadin and a pint of fireball with the note. In case of emergency drink me under their sink.
I just talked this guy out of hooking up with me and gave him relationship advice. Am I a good person now?
Marrying her is the worst scenario of any. That includes death and zombies.
Fuck these bullshit days. My underwear are still inside out.
That moment when you’re at the doctor to give a sperm sample you’re only getting 3G so the porn is buffering
Randomize