I understand how i shit in my shoes, but explain why you were wearing them.
I got tired of walking to the bathroom that I decided to throw up in a cup. I now have 3 cups full of vomit on top of my mini fridge
I just paid a homeless man $20 for the dragon ball Z shirt he was wearing. I need to stop drinking
there is a time and a place for ass-grabbing and that was not it.
Judging by the amount of alcohol multiplied by the amount of her exes here, tonight will be ending in tears.
you went all the way to UK and still managed to hook up with someone from our highschool...
While we were driving she just screams from the backseat: MUMFORD AND SONS DROP THE BANJO and made what were meant to be banjo sound effects
So who was trying to make it rain last night in the bathroom? There are pieces of dollar bill everywhere
I'd google it, but I don't really want my search history to say, "Name for masturbating on a flight."
As he was cumming he yelled "Yahtzee" then said im free to go. Thats my one night stand
I'm just going to take a nap and hope I wake up more attractive.
Wtf happened last night
You traded your bra for a shot so I'd say you probably don't wanna know
We are bad people. This is why we are friends. <3
He fucked me while I was smoking his blunt. His apartment was trashed and he drives a van that looks like it’s been hit by a train but still 10/10 would fuck again.
Sorry. Im too sleepy to penis.
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