toast her oven
toast her strudel
inspect her gadget
she wrote "SORRY" in her vomit and left
We learned about herpes today in bio. I might as well have given the lecture
it's kind of nice to have a picture of me making out with someone and actually know who it is for once
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I was talking to this girl who was in love with the air force. I was doing decently until I mentioned that the navy actually has more planes. Cockblocked by my knowledge of random trivia again.
The other night after we fucked we talked about Lowe's vision insurance. Never fuck a coworker.
Also, I threw up on the playground again. I've honestly had more fun there this past summer than I did in my entire childhood.
I'm getting flash backs of last night. They're coming in song form.
Are you having sex right now? Or is the apt just swaying rhythmically on its own? Either way, awesome.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Love you too. There are very few people I let pee in my dishwasher.
I just explained my sex life to the "if you give a moose a muffin" book... Is that weird?
He's hot and has an accent therefore you don't ask questions when he tells you to take your pants off.
Sex in your truck helped me start regaining feeling in my jaw. Thanks!
Thanks for leaving me with drunk gabby
Hahahaha why what's happening?
She's sending me morse code through the wall....typical
It’s a good thing I’m the only one in the office today. My boy toy stopped by and now there is jiz all over my desk and couch
Randomize