so Brent and I ordered you a drink then realized you don't live here. I drank it.
I don't know what kind of drugs you were on last night but you kept trying to highlight my face because you said I was important
ever had your bank call you to verify the 4 seperate bar transactions from the night before? I have
I just saw two girls throwing up in the bathroom. they were high-fiving under the stall...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just woke up and shes still asleep next to me with her vibrator inside her and on. Whats normal protocol for this situation?
she's laying in my bed with an ice pack on her vagina. how do you think it went?
I just blurted out "it's pretty tight isn't it"
Bitch, I been tryna reach you all day to talk to you about these Dorito tacos.
Yeah, you're right, it's a conspiracy against you. This small tight knit group of people who don't like assholes.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Lets start a coed nudist frat/sorority. It would be amazing. Or just an orgy club. It would also be amazing
I like literally had a visual image of his penis going into your soul
I knew things were bad when my gyno recommended meditation.
come home. I need you. I'm too hungover to deal with this hangover alone
Yeaaaaa...im super disgusted with myself lol...which is interesting, considering all of the things I have done in my life...
We're pretty sure we got naked at Pride, so running the two blocks to your place in my underwear is a step up the dignity ladder really.
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