dude. i was so high. i watched shrek in russian.
I puked last after eating a volcano taco and drinking vodka. I felt like a fucking dragon.
im glad we only fight about serious things like the hills and disney scene it
walked right past julianne moore (on her walk of shame this morning) god i love new york. :)
Her parents walked in on us. So for my birthday they bought me a blow-up doll with their daughters face on it. I don't know what to think right now.
I'm gonna lurk in the mother fucking bushes and watch karma take him down like a gimpy gazelle.
Did a bunch of gravity bongs and am watched hours of Frozen Planet. There is nothing in the world I want more than to hug a polar bear.
There was a pirates of the caribbean marathon on. No matter how much you like rum, it is NOT possible to outdrink the pirates. They always win.
DRAW HIM A PICTURE OF SOME FUCING AWESOME THING. LIKE A UNICORN OR SOME SHIT. FANTASTIC.
Riding the train home at 6 am for class still drunk is losing its novelty in my junior year
He's sending me pics of Yellowstone scenery...the only thing I can think is "I would have sex next to that waterfall"
he just kept texting even after we lit his shoelaces on fire. he just calmly walked into the pool... still texting.
i dont know whats worse..that i woke up in a gorilla suit or that its covered in peanut butter
Soooo I think my neighbor just saw me masturbating on my porch
Makes hanging out interesting when she lights you on fire just to roll ontop of you to 'put you out'.
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