I was staring at you from my window across the quad. I wanted to let you know so it's not creepy
so Brent and I ordered you a drink then realized you don't live here. I drank it.
Whatever. They have the same name, so it's not even cheating. It's brand loyalty.
She said she had a thing for dinosaurs. Come get me now
Ok love is a little strong. But he consented to Nachos, beer and board game date with my cats. Keeper.
you fully convinced the taxi driver that we were in a race
so the good news is that i can't possibly burn my eyelashes off tonight at the bbq.
Dude it was a mini horse. It obviously only eats mini things.
Also, hurry up because I don't like drinking alone. I'm still doing it, but I don't like it.
I just stood next to my childhood self. Fuck, I'm really stoned...
We fucked to the rythmn of the thunder, it was magical
And I'm determined to make an Eiffel Tower happen sometime. I just don't know who will take the pic (first world sex problem?)
I saw this news story about two naked Satanists being arrested so I thought I should ask if you need bail money or pants
looked it up online and zoo tickets are only 20 bucks and there's also a museum of science close to the hotel.
i'm not going to a FUCKING museum. i want to be wasted and possibly double penetrated... have you EVER been on vacation?
Yeah, sometimes it takes a while to realize, wow you kind of suck and not in the fun way
Randomize
