ok so the lil girl sitting behind u was picking the hairs off ur sisters back and putting them in her mouth
thank god random hookups don't end with college. happy birthday, america.
it went kinda like vodka, childhood memories, screaming/cursing, fist fight, tears, broken shit, passing out. in that order. tis the season.
$1.99 mimosas n bloodys til 3. Happy hour starts at 4. We're gonna ride the mechanical bull to kill the hour inbetween.
Please take video.
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you know something has gone wrong in your life when you've gotten a court order to stay away from ALL mc donalds.
she's my drunk super hero.
She's pathetic and vulnerable..and short. Thats his type.
He waited until after foreplay to tell me that he didn't have a condom and "we" would just have to settle for a bj tonight...
Ok, gonna go sleep cuz my brain wants to be smart and not follow my pussy into the danger zone
Is it possibile to sprain your taint?
She was that bad?
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Is it weird that I want to have sex wearing my glasses and lab coat while having an actual scientific discussion?
You kept trying to make people drink "salsa-ritas." But all you did was dump tequila in a half full jar of salsa, and shove it in people's faces while shouting at them.
I couldn't stop laughing at the fact he was cutting lines with a sears card. What 24 year old has a sears card?
We've had gay sex and pie, the holiday season has officially begun.
I pour the whiskey from now on
We stole a Christmas tree from the student center and then decorated it with everything we stole from parties... All I have to say is Feliz Navidad!
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