The best feeling....farting and having the bubble hit your balls
laying in bed listening to christian music, jealous of the hope they have for their life. also need to beat off, can i think about you?
we screwed to my bar mtzvah tape, I became a man while watching myself becom a man
I have a sudden craving for National Treasure 2. THIS IS WHY DRUGS ARE AWESOME
its great to know that you distinguish your relationships on whether you can cum on someone's face
yeah people on the adjacent balcony, Im naked drinking outside in 0 degree weather at 1pm. got a problem?
He was all like, "I think ur the one that got away and I miss you." I replied, "I gave u a hand job once in your hot tub. No need to wax nostalgic about it."
If you hook up with a kid and the next day he breaks up with his girlfriend, those can be seen as two completely unrelated incidents right?!
A guy in the dance floor is raising the roof with an axe in hand. I love Halloween.
K, im gonna wait to get my dick pierced so we can do it as a family function.
That's why you bone lesbian cage fighters and 45 year olds. To make life less boring.
Operation terrify all men while simultaneously make them fall in love with me is going quite swimmingly so far
Just saw a fat guy on a flower print moped. He's my hero.
It true. It written in the Bible.
Yes I remember that, right next to the passage where jesus said unto his disciples, pop molly, fuck bitches amen
So what if is hockey, you don’t turn down sex with a professional athlete. They work out all day and have amazing stamina. Your vagina will thank you!
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