I spent a large portion of the night trying unsuccessfully to keep hayley (who was wearing a dress and no underwear) from doing handstands, but yea it was fun. the boys had fun
No, you can still breathe under the balls.
T-minus about 54 seconds until I am too high to speak English.
I'm jealous
My throat feels like a candle.
I'm at the casino and some dude apparently has money in an entire row of slot machines. Its like watching a really intense adult version of wack a mole
He passed out while I was riding him, and just when I was about to call it quits he opens his eyes and squeezes my boobs and goes Honk! Honk!
Were driving two hours to st louis so we can pee on the arch. See you in the morning. I might be sober by then.
Either I'm losing my touch or ED is running rampant in 20 something men now
Hey. Me and my buddy are drunk. you wanna give us tattoos of the hawaiian punch guy we shall pay very well. Seriously dude. no bull shit.
One good thing out of all this is her ass is huge. Like Australia Big.
First of all guys don't have walks of shame. Secondly there is nothing more epic than riding the skytrain in a toga while everyone else is going to work
Me and the cabbie are stopping on the way at a sit down restaurant to eat. My life is so sad.
She still didn't believe that he would cheat on her so I finally said "how else would I know that his batman mask is still in the back of his car from halloween?" I think she accepted it
You don't know how skeptical I was about letting a guy with braces go down on me
I got horny for like a second but the eggplant snapped me out of it
Did you happen to find the other half of my bra last night?
Randomize
