I'm in a strip club that reminds me of a crack house from the 80's.
i dedicated my morning wood to you.
He needs to realize that there's a big difference between "I love you" and "I love your dick"
And you just kept trying to fit through the dog door and not drop Jello shots.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Couldn't get it up. She asked me what she was doing wrong. Didn't have the heart to tell her. I appreciated her willingness to adapt, but she's pretty much gonna look that bad her whole life.
I will not hesitate to go down on a dick for some cream soda.
I'd like to bring you 40 virgins and treasure chests of gold to make you feel better
You can cross "give someone a blow job while playing Colors of the Wind" off my bucket list.
I made a side by side comparison of her Facebook pic and the chick on the anti meth billboards. Plus a ven diagram showing mostly shared physical attributes. I sent u the PowerPoint. You were sufficiently warned.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I didn't want to see any of his nipples and now I've seen all three. Thanks.
She was way too drunk so I dropped her off at her house and smoked a huge blunt with her mom.
If I had feelings, you would have hurt them.
Wound up hungover. Visiting 4 y/o nephew suggested cookies and milk and playing Kirby with him with the sound down. This kid is going places.
There's a fly in my room repeatedly throwing itself at my window, and I feel it's really symbolic of what I want to do with my future
Have I told you i love you?
there's no need we are two peas in a naughty pod of fuckery
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