I cannot believe how calm you were last night about telling Katie she was on fire.
Day 3. Will have to postpone job hunting by a month. May have blown out my knee. Was sunburned on Friday. Now look painted red. Still alive. All worth it.
he yelled at me for calling the fat girl fat. if I can't call out fat girls to my brother who do i have?
four guys that i have slept with have come into my job today. FOUR. i feel like it's like bring your sex partners to work day.
eating kraft dinner with my face. no forks.
Normal vaginal pH: 3.8 to 4.5. Of course it tastes like a 9-volt. I could run a potato clock on that thing.
Empowerment dancing to Touch Me in the Morning by Diana Ross. Handling this breakup SO well.
Speaking of ejaculate, did you get the side of your car cleaned off?
he forgot we were at my place and not his so he tried kicking me out of my own apartment by saying "so, you can go whenever you want...."
Just woke up. Naked. Under an animal pelt. With a girl. I've never met her. She's pretty naked too.
Good night I hope you dream about knitting and threesomes
Yeah, I'm sure we have time for sex AND ihop.
Three of my exes and one of my exes' brothers have hit me up and it's only been a week. I hate semester break.
Disregard everything I texted you last night. Oh, and disregard me hooking up with your boyfriend.
I should probably apologize for licking you last night since you drove me home, but I stand by my decision
Randomize
