I just caught myself doing the gator chomp to my tv. I need to get laid.
he yelled "RELEASE THE KRAKEN" then hit me with his dick
My mom just said we needed to put weed into our earthquake kit.
I have 250 contacts there has to be someone sober to take me to taco bell
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
There are taser marks on me. Your face flashed before my eyes when i woke up and saw them.
We started telling people we were married, and then we hooked up on a park bench
HOW DID YOU END UP IN THE BATHROOM WITH A DANCER AFTER 12 MINUTES?
I chugged a beer while I was riding him and he told me it was the sexiest thing he has ever seen. this guy knows class when he sees it.
Hey, this is Travis. I just so intelligently deduced that I am in a college dorm somewhere in western oregon. Probably WOU, based on the process of elimination.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
This is like the best thing that's ever happened to us. We're getting paid to sit around get high and eat. There is a Jesus
We were destined to go to rehab together
Lube filled water balloons always make for a good time
It's just great that Easter is on 4/20 this year. Now everyone can enjoy the Easter egg hunts. And being around my whole family.
Are you awake? I feel like I need to confess my sins to someone not on this side of the country.
What's rude is him not accepting my blowjob offer. What kind of guy denies that.
Randomize