I got everything I ever gave her back, every picture, and money for the dog. I didn't want it she brought it all back and gave it to me. clothes jackets, pictures, dried flowers, ear rings, necklace...
Sell it on ebay and let's go to the bar
The iPhone is ruining my ability to sex message. My 5-year-old cousin just picked up my phone at my grandmas birthday party and read "I wanna stand you up and fuck you from behind" to my entire extended family bc of popped up on my screen
when i got to my bed there was a handwritten note that said "wash the sheets." sleeping on the couch.
He wanted to put Kesha on after he came in my mouth. I had to draw some sort of trashy, gay line.
He still lectured me about forgetting shit. Than he said he's gonna paint me green so I can stand in a corner and be a plant.
You were high and telling me you felt like Pinocchio and that fire was bad for wood.
I'm not holding out much hope. She met me in a nighclub when I was arguing with the cigarette machine
he payed over $300 just to break into the hotel pool and skinny dip alone for 5 minutes and then peace in a cab. and all he had to say for himself was "gotta go swimming, gotta live life"
where do u find these people!?
You were crying and asking his mom "why doesn't he like road head?"
walking back to the dorm.. she is flashing evryone, demanding beads. we tried to stop her and now she just keeps yelling "Bourbon st bitchesss"... you get her tomorrow
You can see my drunken state get worse with each picture
Stoned stonnnnnnned on the raaaaange
Well I've consulted some psychics but they keep saying all they hear in my head is screaming and all they see in my future is pool noodles and cheese dip?
I thought he was a lobster and that the moon was going to pull me through him.
I don't think I should try acid.
I don't like kids.
You were literally holding a baby 5 minutes ago
I like them before they learn to speak and after they learn to think.
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