5 Four Lokos being cheaper than a case should be illegal.
Well, McDonalds 'escorted' me out after I passed out mid-order
Thats the last thing I remember and then I woke up in this Dutch kids dorm and he was taking a picture of me while I was sleeping
My afternoon will now be spent googling genital warts. I think my life is over.
Did you know that if you hit someone in the head with a frozen loaf of bread you can knock them unconscious?
I slept with an Israeli and a Palestinian in the same day. It feels wrong.
And now for everyone's least favorite sport... Drunk babysitting.
Mainly I just wanna pet bunnies. And purple chicks. Well any color chicks if I close my eyes. But purple if I open them.
the amount I squirted last night was insane. Im glad i ignored tlc's advice, i went chasing waterfalls and loved every god damn minute of it.
This day took a left turn at "This is your going away party, I got a bunch of blow."
THERE IS WEED IN MY OVEN. HOW AM I EVER SUPPOSED TO MAKE CHICKEN PARMESAN WITH WEED IN MY OVEN.
You're right, I'd say my real all time low was when I let that fifteen-year-old feel my boob.
I just projectile vomited into my kitchen sink. Today need to be over already.
I have a whole new respect for her. She chugged half a bottle of jack daniels, and then peed all over his wall. Serves him right.
I. Love. Skype. Sex.
I think it's just been too long since actual dick has been inside you that you only THINK you love skype sex
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