I am looking at the epitome of fake boobs right now
I just realize today that I've dated three guys this year with their own blog. Ugh that's embarrassing.
This is getting ridiculous. See/touch her boobs=good day. Not see/not touch her boobs=bad day. I am legitimately depressed over the lack of tits in my hands right now.
You are just a treasure cave of fabulous alcoholic ideas.
What do I wear to meet his family/put his dog to sleep? Is there even an appropriate outfit for this occasion?
I think 2012 will be the year I purposely put myself in awkward situations. Much like 2011 but really trying this time. Like fucking the little sister of a girl I already fucked and dating a chick that lives with her ex. It could be awesome or horrible.
he peed on his own floor last night after we left the bar. pretty much sums up how i feel about the evening
How do you feel?
Like the devil himself shit me out, baked me into a pie, ate the pie, and shit me out again.
I didn't want to but I was drunk in a Disney bathroom with her and had a weak moment.
there's an entire drinking game devoted to nobody liking her face
The guy at the rodeo just told me "if ya don't say none, ya don't get none". What the hell does that mean?
Im pretty sure you just got hit on by a gay cowboy.....
My niece I'm babysitting left earlier to stay the night with her friend. I got ditched by an 8 year old.
It was platonic naked porno viewing, I swear.
I'm listening to a women in metal station and wearing a flannel. I may have approached peak lesbian.
Shame is for Republicans.
Randomize
