No it wasn't her, this girl had both hands.
okay I may or may not have wrapped my body pillow up in your t-shirt and sprayed it with your axe and am now spooning with it.
again? I'm starting to get a little creeped out now.
you busted in the room, ripped the covers off of us, ... and fist pumped
You almost set me on fire last night.
You probably deserved it.
I miss my brother. He would have fucked the fat girl for me.
I told you I would
I wouldnt do that to you. You're my actual friend
alright. I just need to set some ground rules, no lighting me on fire, and no broken bones. fair?
Doap. Just bring some lube and a slingshot. Not sure y we need the slingshot.
i was trying to figure out what "tidy fucking" was when i realized he meant "titty fucking" and i need to start banging smarter people....
Personally, if my roommate had a nice friend who made me dinner, gave me free beer, a 4am meal, a couch to sleep on in an apartment on the beach, and breakfast when I woke up, and I found out that said roommate was fucking her, I'd be all... right on! She's cool! Thanks for the quesadillas!
Worse than that. I caught my roommate jerking off to a topless stripper in gta 5.
I've been to his house multiple times since that night and I STILL can't find my bra. And he says the hot tub ate my thong.
Tequila ran out around 11 so she let them do body shots of chips and guacamole instead
I try not to flex my sex appeal too much around the engineers, it's like feeding bears...always ends in disaster.
hey. this is your former cousin. you boned my best friend last night.
But you''re still having sex with him. And a hobo convinced you to.
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