just credit carded her and her mom at the same time... that drunk. get on my level
thing about being the result of a teen pregnancy is that all my baby pictures are of my mom and dad holding me around their stoned college friends.
the police told me I had to sign a waiver stating that my car will no longer be used for crime activity.
Paris has not been good for her. Everytime she has a one night stand from a different country, she buys a mini flag and tapes it to her wall with the others
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
But break dance skills will only take you so far
He said, "cum on daddy's dick!" ... I pictured my dad. That just scarred me for life.
I'm sitting on my couch eating a bag of marshmallows and watching someone run bare ass down the street. What has happened to my life?
If I do nothing else today, the fact that I talked you into this is achievement in itself.
dude...i punched my best friend in the face, broke up with my girlfriend, and shit my pants.......now i don't know which one to take care of first.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Never thought having a box of Cheerios could get me laid. My new lucky charm hello girl in 2B
He just felt my tits to find out which piercing I lost.
Why is everyone judging me for telling the cat a bedtime story?
Peeing in taco bell cups is part of the fun of going to taco bell
She was riding me and giving me score updates to the basketball game at the same time..... Shes a keeper
I'm not too sure what happened last night, but by the looks of it, we must have gotten drunk with zebras.
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