Michelle and I recorded her bunny humping it's little rubber black ball.
Bring booze and chicks. Separate, or one already in the other. Your call.
Just made hot dog dorito pasta. It happened.
will you please explain to me as to why or how i have a dirtbike tread looking bruise on my back?
My last memory involves me naked in a mens's bathroom stall. I really hope my date was with me.
hes like my own personal sex toy i use him on the weekends and then i have the option to put him away all week
Got a stripper to howl at my wolf shirt.
I cannot take someone's straight and gay virginity in one threesome. It's just too much responsibility.
unfortunetly they frown upon drunk on duty paramedics
Just so we're clear this time around: This is dinner with my FAMILY. Not an opportunity for you to drink too much, and use the word "dick-thumpin" in casual conversation.
I'm literally taking a shit naked holding a bottle of wine.
I've finally done it, I've downloaded some messenger lesbians like to use because some girl wanted to flirt.
Congrats, you're all grown up now.
I FEEL LIKE A GAY BUTTERFLY
The one that slept in my truck and you peed in his face?
You know you're an adult when you start planning your hookup a week in advance
I don't care how hot she was. She didn't like Scooby Doo and I don't fuck with that.
Randomize
