You made me cry and you don't even care
it got awkward when she realized that our nickname for her was "The Hambeast"
throwing condoms aimed at his crotch probably isn't the politest way to ask for sex
I just dont understand why you didnt cut me off when I took the funnel into the bathroom and started peeing and funneling at the same time
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He thought I was flirting with him but really I just needed someone to hold me up.
Thank god for makeup because it looks like someone took a shit on my face
I like how my motivation to lose weight is so I can wear a nude bikini and get covered in body paint for the tribal party. Priorities.
Is there a word in the English dictionary for impressed, yet disgusted?
I think the word you're looking for is flabbergasted.
Just set out 2 water bottles as an offering to my hungover self.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So many weird people in this class. I can practically taste their unwanted virginities. They taste bad.
I know how vodka works Grace. I'm drunk, not stupid.
I was gonna jerk off, but then I thought about that movie last night and it killed that idea. I have serious boner trauma.
His Australian accent during sex made me think I was in an Outback Steakhouse commercial
u better not lose ur virginity to a sugar daddy who doesn’t post a pic of himself to tinder
Ps can u get with my cousin? He's a freshman at uconn and he's very attractive but like were related....
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