If she sucks any more cock I swear she will be a spermivore
i wish that high-me and normal-me were two different ppl so that high-me could thank normal-me for setting out a feast before smoking
I wish that high-you wouldn't text me stupid shit at 3:30 in the morning
so sad. i just ate the last good 'n' plenty out of the bottom of my purse.
Yes, I am watching The Hills Have Thighs. And yes it is a porno remake of The Hills Have Eyes. And, again, yes, lesbian sex in the desert. Get the sand out.
I tried douching with a turkey baster. Not the brightest idea.
Please don't ever try giving my cat a hair cut ever ever again
Drunk wheelbarrow races might make the top 10 list of dumb shit weve done. Especially considering all the broken glass around...
yea im pretty sure it has something do with my love of forearms...
I literally saw him try to open a beer can with his anus. We need o step up our game.
I command you to take a shot and dance like the pretty little gay boy you are.
my last clear memory of the night was being offered a shot but having so much alcohol in my hands that someone literally had to pour it in my mouth for me. after that it pretty much skips to waking up face down and shirtless on my floor.
That hot guy i showed you guessed my exact bra size. I want to have his tan babies.
In my top drawer right now, there are see's chocolates, condoms, weed, and my vibrator. One way or another, this is going to be a good night
Ya it was crazy the power went just as she was about orgasm and the vibrator got fried with the power surge
Santi's no longer allowed to buy booze in my lane. Last thing I need is a midlife crisis looking at his Id again.
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