He toold me that when we were younger I was his boner buddy.
if I see one grey pube I'm spitting his penis out!
i was gonna fuck her but then she started eatin sushi from her purse. i really need to raise my standards
We broke the shower door. Completely off. His roommates were not happy but I sure was
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
how the fuck is Katelyn 5'1" and 85 lbs and she tackled a bouncer to the ground?
I have too much respect and admiration for my dick to put it into a situation where he could possibly be killed
I creeped him on fb. I'm about 90% sure I just blew him in the same tux he wore for his wedding..
Yah... You need to get here. Evan just peed off the karaoke stage.
& I just realized there is no vomit smiley. There needs to be a vomit smiley
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Oh my god there are animals here. There are actusal animals trying to get him. A giraffe is trying to get in. A giraffee is trying to get in. Is ridiculouss.
I CAN ONLY BE THE BIRDIE ON YOUR SHOULDER WHO LEADS YOU INTO BAD DESCISIONS
What am I even going to do with 20 more jello shots? And don't say give them to the cat
I found one of those wine glass confetti bits in my ass crack.
YOURE A FUCKING ADULT. DONT TELL ME ITS PAST YOUR BEDTIME WHEN I WANT TO GET ANOTHER COCKTAIL.
she is currently in the shower drinking a beer and dancing to a song called "the penis song" my roommate is cooler than yours
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