i waited two years for her to sleep with me. it just didnt seem worth it.
she lost her virginity three hours after you dumped her.
are you serious?
the non-midget kid sent 8,000 texts in a month. the midget parents are pissed. THIS IS EPIC WHEN YOUR HIGH.
We argued about the championship during sex. Absolutely the manliest moment of my life.
I am at the point where deciding not to drink alone is worth a rocky music montage in and of itself.
I don't care how old I am, if it's your 21st birthday I'm going to make out with you.
Can't a girl send out a 4 pm booty call anymore
I paid your cover too so you're on the list as tits mcgee. You're welcome :D
Honestly, I've had enough of his asshole to last me the new year.
Please tell me you're talking about his personality.
You never know, some chick could have a weird unibrow fetish.
she was trying to use her iTranslate app while we were having sex.
Kyle's mobile fuck service..... Kinda has a nice ring to it don't you think??
Not my type. One of those types that loves that they're educated, could drink their red wine and have an intellectual conversation and have a wonderful time
An adult?
I guess I was blacked out I hopped a fence and hugged a cow that night.
The only people who will bring me pizza or tacos want a commitment and I'm hungry for food not their love.
Are you jealous of my sweatsuit? It's how I get men on Tinder.
Randomize
