Don't threaten to terrorize my ass hole unless you have to wherewithal to back it up
week 6 of class: i have yet to go to spanish sober. i love being THAT girl.
Knee deep in strippers, everything is comped. will try hard to be there at 8. i promise.
I opened my door to go to class and all there was was a raccoon puking on the doorstep. In hindsight, it was a very accurate omen.
Heading to the gym, the one that guy said he goes to. Already checked online, his class is at 5. And no, this isn't too much after meeting him last night. Stop judging me,
i'll get you drunk even if i have to inject alcohol into your arm through an IV
you're the only one i would trust to do that
Do you remember Kelly my alter personality? She talked like a man and would sing amazing grace?
U should feel bad.. u r like a sex politician. All talk and no follow thru
Things were easy when he was just a penis. Now he's a penis with feelings.
I'm really glad that we can be casual hook up buddies. This is a true friendship. Now, please convince your roommate to do the same. Thanks.
Do you know how to get blood out of tile grout?
woke up in a random sweater in a random bed in a random house on a street I don't recognize..
also, I vaguely remember swapping shirts with some random guy on the dance floor.
Shut the fuck up! I can hear you having sex over Pirates of the Caribbean you moaning whore.
I feel like I'm a car that keeps getting Bacardi 151 instead of fuel
I just don't understand what you plan on accomplishing there except for losing all vestiges of post-freshman year dignity
Randomize
