the young, male pastor of my church has a jesus fish tramp-stamp. I made him show me.
Every time a guy reaches down to touch my vag, i feel really sorry for all the transgender girls who still have a penis there.
That's weird cause every time i feel a girls vag i feel way worse for all the guys who reached down there and got a penis.
I threw up into my coffee this morning.
You seriously don't know?He was trying to arrest you and you were shouting that you were being punk'd. Punk'd? that show got cancelled like 5 years ago.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
just customized my debit card w a pic of me ralphing over the toilet. figure it'll give the bar keep a good cut off est and for shits n giggles when buying my handles at the liqour store
id like to know how you successfully locked me in your backseat last night
My last memory involves me naked in a mens's bathroom stall. I really hope my date was with me.
As usual, I had to fight him for his car keys. Though this time he made it to the valet garage. All the Hispanic attendants gathered around and watched. Felt like I was in a cock fight.
He just told me the blow job I gave him was like a journey
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I have no idea. But I feel like I could climb a mountain and then have sex on it.
He brought me breakfast in bed after our one night stand. Beer and Cheerios I may come back to this place
How early is too early to study with margaritas?
eh, I feel I'm heading for a breakdown and I need to get it out of the way before I start writing that lab report.
Disregard everything I texted you last night. Oh, and disregard me hooking up with your boyfriend.
I’ve got a sex swing and lube, he’s not going anywhere soon
Randomize