Drinking non-alcoholic beer is like going down on your cousin.
Sure it tastes the same, but it ain't right.
We traveled between two mile markers in 18 seconds. Do the math.
How do u get a lost condom out? Like really lost... up there...
Why do I feel like I'm not the only one drinking to make my night class teacher look better?
I've been thinking about it and if we ever have a threesome it'll start off with us clothed solely in our matching fur vests
Haha, you avoided her at all costs. And then she shoved her tits in your face
He looks like he's going to feed me a taco and then stab me. It's probably a good idea he's a lawyer
The Mole People would help. They are a kind, helpful people, the Mole People are.
Mole people?
Mole people
Remember that mom/daughter stripper team? Well i just met the ex husband/father in AA. WOW!!!! WOW....
Dicks are so weird. He has kind of a feminine comforter in the background.
I've been back for one day and I've already given two bjs. Improvement from last year.
You kept ranting how Captain Planet is getting shortchanged in the superhero department. Other than that you kept it together
All I know for sure is, I went to bed drunk and I woke up in a relationship..I think I need to reevaluate my drinking skills.
I mean I've only met the girl once and she was trying to slit some guys tires.
I know it's New Year's Eve but if you're going to have a bunch of chicks playing strip go fish in our apartment I need a heads up.
Randomize
