My boss just told me $1,000 at a six hour event wouldn't be worth her time. She makes $70k a yr. and apparently never learned multiplication.
I feel uncomfortable when she gargles my jizz.
I think vodka calistinics prior to and during beer olympics was a bad idea
If there is a god, you will have pink eye tomorrow.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We had sex in the bathroom. Then he told me I could watch him pee.
I love shooting for the middle. Those girls never wake up well.
The sad part is I didn't even want to get laid. I just wanted the emotional connection, but my vagina was screaming "TOUCH ME. TOUCH ME RIGHT NOW BECAUSE MY DADDY ISSUES ARE MUCH DEEPER THAN MY EMOTIONAL NEEDS!" Vodka has a way of getting me out of my emotions and gets me fucked every time.
i don't know what body building stuff he's on, but his cum is basically a 5 hour energy shot.
Hungover playing piano at a baptism I am the PICTURE of class I feel like I should be struck by lightning
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Everybody posting sickening holiday couple pics and I'm over here deepthroating a bottle of whiskey.
I caught myself caressing my own hand while nurturing a glass of bourbon. I think it's time to get back out there.
i just sexted for my mom while she was driving, i have hit an all time low.
cant one of your roommates drive you?
You came in my eye once. You owe me.
ill be there in 20
He punched me in the face while giving him road head, because he was driving stick. I shit you not.
Like at first he was barely doing anything. So I was like harder and then holy shit he's like going all HULK SMASH on my vagina. I mean it felt fucking awesome. BUT STILL
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