he's 24. he finally texted me instead of using facebook chat. baby steps.
I found your twin in sf. His name is ryan. And you are the evil one.
she read insantiy as in-nast-tit-ty and asked what the hell does that mean...
I think its only fitting my first purchase with my student loan is a glass pipe? I think ill name it 'Subsidized'
Yeah getting kicked out of the bar at 1 pm really set the tone for the day.
No she had like 2 shots and started ironing her clothes and whispering random shit in my ear
so the photographer said "let's get a picture of the cousins" so we posed together, and then he said " lets get a picture of the couples" So we posed together.
So I've decided to grow a vagina forest. Because I'm single and it's like a zen garden. Brings a new meaning to long hair don't care.
I got kicked out of the men's bathroom at the diner last night because i was straddling the sink attempting to pee with pants on. Beat that.
I say I hate my boss but I find myself jerking off to him more and more with each passing day
He woke me up, handed me a ringing phone and said break up w her for me. That hung over.
He yelled "HOO-ah!" like Al Pacino when he pulled down his pants. Trust me, he has every right to.
It was the highest I'd ever been. I felt like a blob. A blob eating a burrito.
Oh god he’s a clown I fucked a rodeo clown
I mean, he’s listed as “Andrew DC Threesome” in my phone. THATS HOW I REMEMBER HIM! How is that not the start of a fairytale?
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