we went through the mcdonalds drive through and you asked for a free sample of their fries to see how you liked them.
So i closed my laptop as i started to fall off my bed and then i caught myself and realized that moment of catching myself is the difference between tuesday and friday.
Please check on her. She announced that Thursday she'd open herself to any veteran so as to thank them for their service. "my services for your service" and left the bar with three numbers.
searching "dave" under the university of pittsburgh on facebook was not exactly how i hoped to find my baby daddy
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I wish I could like. Pull my liver out, and put it in the corner of a boxing ring, put a towel and ice on it, rub it's shoulders, and tell it to "get back in there, you got this!".
Fucked a kid by the name of your hometown tonight... FOR THE WIN.. BF4L
I shit you not. Dude complemented me for being meme savvy. You could drown a toddler in my panties right now.
We just had sex on an abandoned logging road while wearing snow shoes. God bless Montana boys.
Weddings might be fun but they are not getting fucked in the wilderness fun.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Do you know this guy sitting in front of us? Asking for my vagina.
I've also stopped shaving, like, everything. I can't tell if I'm empowered or sad
Every time Brady gets sacked I cum a little...
Just escaped from the ER. Meet me at the bar in 20 minutes.
At least he uses his lack of impulse control for chaotic good instead of chaotic evil
My horoscope should say: you're an alcoholic, get help today, Pisces
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