shes hot in the i'd deny it if anyone asked kinda way
I want the hot one, scratch that. anyone.
ok what kind of idiot turns down casual afternoon sex?
It's true- you can buy beer at McDonald's in France. I'm not coming back to the States.
I walked into his room and he was naked with a half eaten pecan pie and a bottle of wine.
Just found out my ex boss was running a whore house in the bar. Time to remove her as a reference?
So I was thinking for Halloween I'd do Dr. Jekyll and Mr. Hyde....for my vagina.
As I'm trying to leave her house she shushes me and puts my hand on her boob, then goes back to sleep. In like 30seconds. What the fuck.
Is it weird that the girl he dated after me had a child with him and it has my name? I think it means he's not over me. Or I'm really self absorbed...
It's a "party harder or raise your standards" kind if night.
I'm glad I can share my workout progress with you via my nudes
Take home message: SPERM IS EVIL AND SHOULD NEVER EVER EVER BE ALLOWED UP ONE'S NOSE.
You think that was bad? One time my parents found my sister half naked on top of the four runner in the garage. She makes me look like the good child.
I got snowed in at my parent's. everyone's asleep so I'm smoking a joint in my old room and watching Tarzan on a 12" tv.
They must be so glad to have you home...
Dude, don't beat around the bush. We're fucked and you know it.
Randomize
