don't you miss dr. quinn: medicine woman? i do.
So I just saw a commercial for tickle me Elmo furry gloves. And I thought hmm I bet I could jerk off with those. Is that a sign of deepseated charachter issues?
The worst part is I think my tongue cut his penis and now he wont talk to me.
i'm sitting in the library realizing that the 2 most productive things i did this weekend was have sex and go to the liquor store...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just try to lay there and not be pregnant.
On the way home from Florida I threw up at the beginning border and ending border of 6 states. You win this year Spring Break.
I walked in on you eating olive oil off of a plate. you gave me this look and I just started crying. we were that drunk.
deryk tried to steal your screen door and i think sam and brent are duct taping lauren to the diving board.
HE'S turngign 18teen real soon.k
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I really am. The stoner chick wants to get a python.
I can't turn my head to the left, I'm pissing out of my ass, and my finger went through the toilet paper today... I need you.
he told me while inside me and mid thrust that he's dreamed of that moment since high school... awkward
I'm glad you enjoyed the night but why were you calling me "daddy"?
Apparently I made a chicken patty, angrily took it out of the microwave, walked outside, and threw it over the balcony. #me
Why are you drunk at the library?
Why not?
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