Do vagina's smell?
I get so lonely sometimes I set my phone's alarm to go off every 5 minutes or so and imagine people are texting me.
Cumbucket.....OH MY GOD THAT COMES UP AUTOMATICALLY NOW!!
i just heard one Asian kid say to another, "i bet if i could get into Harvard i could get laid all the time, my brother lost his virginity the first night there."
he sent me a winky sad face. i cannot deal this level of pathetically needy flirtatiousness.
We are lost. Everyone is drunk and it all went downhill after we iced the bus driver.
i proceeded to stick my hands in his pants while he continued to repeat i have a girlfriend
and now there are teeth marks on my dick.
I'm more concerned about the fact that I can't feel my gums
We somehow managed to get the sumo-wrestler costume into the washing machine, but I don't think the cupcake icing completely came off... And it still smells like tequila.
We started telling people we were married, and then we hooked up on a park bench
Fake an illness. Her and her friends are like the female version of guys who wear tapout shirts
And for some reason I just want to have sex with EVERYTHING
Just called the boss a "cunt baguette". To her face. This is why I can't drink with people from work. Know of anywhere that's hiring?
Shut the fuck up! I can hear you having sex over Pirates of the Caribbean you moaning whore.
Randomize
