"Monday" is guna come over...
but its Thursday?
yeah, but she cant make it.Monday can...so there ya go
I'm curled up in a ball on the floor of my office with the lights off. I hope no one notices. No more open bar. Woof.
Ever since they found the bud they've been sending me visa gift cards instead of cash. Bastards.
like in an apt above a crackhead. A LEGIT CRACKHEAD. he woke me up every morning this week asking me if I wanted to buy a mini fridge and some CDs. at 5 am. EVERY DAY.
this is the 21st century. you drunk fuck him and then go on a date.
i have one question about last night
if this is about your fridge being filled with hotdogs, sour cream, and PB&J open-faced sandwiches, i can explain
my co-worker, his best friend who also works with us, an my baby daddy, ive turned love triangle into a retarded shape with to many sides to pronounce
it's too soon in the relationship to think about him when i masturbate. so i think about his dad instead.
There's a warrant out for his arrest for throwing a mannequin through a bus stop.
Christ, I really took the slutcake last night.
Wait. Someome brought slutcake?
Pounding your chest saying "me Tarzan" is not flirting or even talking
the new numbers in my phone would beg to differ
Last night someone asked you what your favorite color was and you said "bagel."
He started yelling "you tha man!" while I was reverse cowgirl
I'm sittin in my Hawaiian shorts watching the office eating cold asparagus. wow do I suck when you're not here.
I brought my porn computer to class by accident
How much porn do you watch if you need a special computer?
Randomize
