id tell you what to do, but my morals dont exactly scream, "Listen to this guy!"
After he finished I threw up my arms and shouted STEVE HOLT!
Are you seriously drinking already? It's 11AM. Still morning.
I'm going by McDonald's time. And since they stop serving breakfast at 10:30 and start serving lunch, it is now afternoon.
Today a TA in one of my classes told me he thought I was 35 and going back to school as an adult learner. Alcohol is working me.
At the T-Rex bar with my nephew...only in Disney can I have a beer and a soda at the bar with a 4 year old
his fiance had made him a calendar of pictures of her. he asked if he should take it down and i said no. i wanted her to watch.
I have no idea how to attract men with my personality anymore. He can't see my tits via facebook chat
whiskey dick. though we did manage to break my closet door and flood the bathroom.
I left my coke in the bird nest in the bathroom stall last night but I found it nest and all in my purse I love morning suprises
I cut myself stripping on your car. Probably a profession I shouldn't pursue
I mean, if there was a version of you with a penis, you'd fuck it...right? Like just outta curiosity at least
Currently googling hangover cures, which looks a lot like working from the perspective of my boss.
The beauty of getting kicked out of college again is I can fuck my professor's brains out and she can't get fired now
He saw my Halloween/ Costume closet and assumed I’m into cosplay. I’m going with it. What’s sexier, a cop or a nurse?
In the words of Disney’s Jafar, “desperate times call for desperate measures.”
Randomize
