...is it true? will i see you next weekend
YES.
ah, i can't wait till there's negative 2 inches between us
I really shouldn't have to apologize. It was your own damn fault for opening a tab at the bar and telling me about it.
the only compliment i could think of for this chick was that she looked 'moderately attractive'
Last time I stayed at my moms my fucking car got set on fire sooo maybe I should think this through.
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Well anything after a French guy would have been a disappointment. But I'm fairly certain he was just trying to masturbate into me.
There is a pile of hair outside the apartment next door. At least now I know what all that shouting was about last night.
On a scale of 1 to "bad descision", where does stealing my racist neighbors dog and giving him my roomates dildo for a chew toy rate?
Irrelevant. Does he have queso? That's the real question.
He had a step stool to get in to his bed!
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Tolerating him while I'm not drunk is like trying to find a word that rhymes with orange
So TMI but just realizing I have not masturbated since trump took office. He's sucked the sex drive out of me.
He told me that he wants to fuck me only wearing a princess tiara...How could I possibly say no to that?
its not even a love triangle. its a love square and it has come back to haunt me
So do I get points for screwing my recently single ex boyfriend and then telling him to go fight for his ex back?
I told him I lived in the apartment beside his brother and he said "oh, you're the girl that watches really loud porn!"
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