just took a shot of grandma at the fucking bowling alley... this is going to be interesting
Good. I was naked most of the night. But sometimes I would wear my tux vest...But only my tux vest. It was classy
he had a blacklight sublime poster, of course i had to do him.
Left for charity run at 5AM. Saw a pigeon eating last night's vomit and a pair of shame-walkers in high heels. Nature at it's finest.
what's not responsible about a pool full of beer?
Nothing is more important than the last pool party of the season. Call in sick or gay or something.
I just tripped out to the Angel of Music from Phantom of the Opera in my car. Wayyyy to high for shuffle right now.
Just realized that St. Patty's is on a Saturday this year in case you were interested in coming to New York and redefining bender with me.
I am so proud of him. After eating the rest of our shrooms, he finally registered to vote
All I really remember is shouting "THANKS FOR LETTING ME MAKE OUT WITH YOUR GIRLFRIEND."
What can I say? You have this amazing power over straight girls.
I will now send you explicit pics of mine and her genetalia bound together forever in the devils dance that is sexting.
I got about 15 snapchats from you with your hand saying "you want cheese sticks" or something like that and one of some weird looking weed
They finally caught us and banned us forever, but it was worth it because we didn't have to pay for light bulbs for at least 3 years.
So you stole light bulbs, from your favorite bar, and got banned, and you're happy?
Look we couldnt pay for light bulbs and ramen, and you can't eat light bulbs or cook in the dark. Win - win.
I have to shave my legs first. I'm afraid tiny woodland creatures will fly out if he tries touches them.
Drove by a guy getting road head, midday on O Street. That could be us, but you won't let me in your pants when you drive.
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