You just left with that feminine looking guy you kept calling "Jessica." Just giving the heads up.
farters have to be the big spoon...
Dude I think I vomited on the wireless internet box too...it isnt working.
if you do the accent, i'll wear the eyepatch
It's awesome, he has so much more free time now that he's not screwing other girls behind my back
Can I borrow you for, like, thirty minutes so you can lay on one boob and rub the other until I fall asleep?
I totally forgot about finals week. im the worst adderall salesman ever.
I am on top of a rooftop peeing on your freedom
Also, did you really start discussing the weather in the middle of telling you my sexual fantasy about you?
And my nipple is sore from him biting it. That is not a complaint.
He is currently passed out on his toilet. Point day drinking.
Im wearing black today mourning the orgasm i couldn't get this morning :(
I ate too many pot brownies and passed out topless with my boobs painted like the American flag
He gave me a back massage while we were fucking.
Did you get that?
WHILE WE WERE FUCKING.
Ahhh the shame of taking out my recycling
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