I want you more than these girls want KFC
Y'know, without the cops, it would've just been us daydrinking,
Checked out the free sonogram van on campus and got a free DVD of my sweet food baby.
The only good thing about trampolines when you're fucked up is the gushing blood really cleans all the bad coke out of your nose.
party gras won. party gras always wins.
His "hunger Strike for change" lasted 4 days. Hi welcome to my coke binge last weekend....not impressed
What's life without a lamp shade you wore home?
I have their Unicorn picture in my shirt, and I just threw a Bud Light Platinum bottle through their window. We need to go now.
I know. But whatever I'll just eat cold pizza and play with my cats by candlelight
Do I have to formally apologize to Brett for flashing him?
These people don't understand my stages of drunk
I just ate beer and cupcakes for breakfast.... maybe this fourth of july won't be so bad
Wtf is this place? I don't see any alcohol and I feel like we were supposed to bring our own strippers.
I'm drunk but I just ate 2 heads of broccoli so does that mean it evens out?
Yes absolutlely
"Uno más" are officially my least favorite words in the entire Spanish language.
Randomize
