you know how they say when you die, your whole life flashed before you? well do you get to see what happened all the nights you blacked out?
jusi got death stares at taco bell because I asked if Denise was working.
How can it be called memorial day weekend....I don't even remember this weekend
I just want to apologize for screaming when I saw you the other day. It's just that you looked really gross and I was high.
I told him he was my first gentile. He was so flattered.
i mad aa ber float. budweiser nd ice creem. it amzig.
I don't know... But I do think this is probably the longest series of texts we've written discussing your cock. David was right, it is a brave new world. Also, slow day at work again?
I would feel bad sleeping with her unless all of her personalities were on board with it.
Exactly. Some of us want to get married. And some of us want to wear sombreros and do cocaine. To each their own.
PLAN B IS EXPENSIVE ON A $50 A WEEK BUDGET.
I guess she fell asleep at the strip club and the other one was crying because she had a vagina in her face. Happy 21st!
I was in the bathroom and I heard a phone ding inside one of the stalls. I really wanted to say, nature is calling, but I was still in my work uniform
"hahahaha" is not a sufficient reply when I tell you my mother laughed at a joke about me giving blowjobs.
I know it sounds cheesy, but i think both me and her mum know they are "thanks for being so cool about finding nudes of your daughter on the camera" flowers
I guess I'm famous. Hot lesbian was WARNED about me. Still hooked up with her.
I'll pay you to teach me.
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