Situation: He got it in my eye, how long do I let it sting before should start to worry?
just googled chastity belt to see if it really exist..
I made my rape whistle into a roach clip device. FRESHMAN YEAR!
i was playing the convince him im sober game through texting. i spelled most of the words right. i hope.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I need a gatorade, my back cracked, my crimper, my shot glass, a sock of rice and an explanation.
You did this to yourself.
As we're eating sushi she goes I just want to get a disease so my mom can take care of me... Great first date
Taking Gomer to the ER. He tore something trying to stretch his nutsack enough to put his balls in his own ass. I need new friends.
I don't remember much of last night. But I woke up with very apologetic texts from him this morning so apparently I didn't get laid. Which is stupid.
So I went to daintily fall onto my bed like I was in a hotel commercial and I completely missed my matress and landed on my floor. Just thought u should know.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I didn't know whether to laugh at the fact that a dog bit his balls or throw up cause my dad was telling me a story involving his balls.
So I guess I bought a cat last night. Fuuuccckkk.
He carried you out but the best part is you kept saying "can't I keep dancing" as you were gushing blood
I'm laughing at the fact that I'm at Target right now buying vitamins and alcohol.
I think I won an award for shitting and vomiting at the same time.
I'm worried about us. We are almost 30 and we still drink jaeger bombs till we black out. Wait, no I'm not. I'm excited about us.
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