Michelle Duggar likes to fuuuuck
Okay I'm all about any plan that ends with "We're gonna get you drunk."
sorry for allegedly lighting the beer pong balls of fire
You know I told you about that hammering at 3 AM yesterday? Turns out it was Holly beating the lock out of her door with a mallet because she'd forgotten her keys.
Doesn't she keep a spare?
Drunk Holly doesn't listen to Sober Holly's plans.
Apparently we were just playing "bang a bridesmaid". I'm not sure if I won or lost...
After Madison dropped a bottle of full vodka an it shattered on the floor, it was quiet for literally 3 min straight and then drew said "the booze gods have spoken"
because i know somewhere at some party, behind someones closed bed room door youre being feed a key full of mollie.
I found him in his pink and white boxer out side the dorm hall and the only thing he said was "it wouldn't let me in"
Went to the elf storage building to help him get his old dresser. Found his brother's stash in the drawer and ended up passed out w him on the mattress in there instead.
Happy meals everywhere. I think Ronald McDonald Claus visited.
Riding the train home at 6 am for class still drunk is losing its novelty in my junior year
I hope every time you eat hashbrowns you think about me, the awesome sex we had and how great we could have been.
I don't know if I'm more disturbed by the fact that you hooked up with a dude with one arm, or that "hook up with a dude with one arm" was on your bucket list.
You kept saying, "please sir, can I have some more."
There's so many drinking games in the Olympics.
you missed out this chick was licking her paddle
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