I feel like our house is getting pulled over.
He started yelling "we're making a baby" mid thrust.. probably not the right guy for me right?
Every time you buy a sobe you buy a bong.
His penis makes me feel like a mystic dragon sliding down a turbo slide covered in white gumdrops and sour cashews
Same.
I couldn't find the bathroom last night...so I wrapped myself in the curtains and stuck my butt out the window and peed from two stories up. Thank god I don't remember.
Think I can pull off edward 40 hands before class?
You might end up in the wrong class.
I'm a COM major, they're all the wrong class.
I just don't know the best way to tell him I think I saw him in a porn. I mean I got off to it, isn't there some level of awkwardness there?
It's that whole "half Japanese, half asshole" thing. My brother and I have found that people really go for that
I'd probably lick every tooth in Carly Rae Jepson's fucking mouth.
Teen Choice Awards are on if your wondering.
Wow! It's so great to hear from you! We all thought you perished in Winepocalypse 2012, man.
I remember climbing onto your table and singing"tequila tequila" into your candlesticks. I apologize.
I'm owning this being a social human being thing tonight!
They had an Olympic theme party at her work yesterday. She brought home her fake gold medal and hung it on my cock after she rode me.
How proud should I be that I googled "dildo with wheels" and actually got the result I wanted?
The girl at the liquor store remembered me as "the girl who pays in hundreds" so she didn't ID me
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