If it were my dying wish, would you come over 2nite 2 save me?:):):) wana come anyways?
Ok walking to car, 3 gay guys park get out of car, one on phone says 'I dont know but I was definately getting some curb rubbing'
i don't know how boys match. i think shoes & belt are the only thing. it doesn't matter. i just know if they look stupid.
He lets me throw up in him even if i do it mistakeily- erica talking about the toilet
dude, when you're random girl from last night came down the stairs this morning she fell all the way down. I laughed. She just walked out. I hope shes ok. Tell her I give her a 10 for that landing though.
I want you to come here and listen to her climax and then tell me how funny you think it is.
I'm blazed about to take my 8am final. Another girl is too. We just looked each other in the eyes. She's my soul sister.
HE HAS A FUCKING TWIN. HE HAS A TWIN. I'M NOT DRUNK THERE IS TWO OF THEM.
I've given up for the day already. I just wanna eat cheesecake and hide from her.
A gay dude just spanked me with a nicholas sparks novel and called me foxy. I'm putting this on my resume.
So I'm going to regale you with a tale of someone who went out, was fed way to many shots, got super wasted and now has a date with one of the security guards from the building but has no idea what his name is. That someone is me
Easter bunny might get some gnarly munches and not even have enought candy left to hand out
doing squats while I brush my teeth.. gotta keep the booty in check
I told myself I'd stop after three shots of fireball. Haha HA hA.
Just saw a fat guy on a flower print moped. He's my hero.
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